At least six impossible things to do before breakfast

I am supposed to prepare students for tests in two subjects, returning other tests and doing reviews. I am supposed to do PARCC testing for almost 3 full days this week. I am supposed to give tests that are not PARCC. I am supposed to do a fun activity to teach a new math concept. I’m afraid to even start that math activity because there’s no way to make a kid use Playdoh quickly and everything we do will have to be done at near light-speed to make this work.

Eduhonesty: This ship is not even going to try to make the Kessel run in however many parsecs. (Yes, I know a parsec is a unit of distance.) The unfortunate truth is that students don’t work well at light-speed. On the way to work, I will figure out what to jettison. Obviously, the quarter’s final instruction will be what I stuff in the airlock, since I can’t jettison PARCC. Federal tests are not optional.