I will ‘fess up here. I am working on presenting comprehensible material in my classroom. As a result, I have fallen behind the scheduled lesson plans created by outsiders who have never been in my classroom, the scripted plans that match everyone else’s in the school but that don’t seem to be working well for (duh) special education and bilingual classes. I will never catch up. I will just keep going.

Eduhonesty: The stress on teachers has skyrocketed around me. I hit the wall the day before yesterday and blasted out in a few staff meetings. Actually, I think I may have looked like I was cracking up in one of these meetings. My department head brought me the Kleenex because I had entered that state between laughing and crying, choking out laughs as the tears began, nearing the border of hysteria. As I told the group, I felt like a Gorn from Startrek throwing boulders at my students and hoping some of my boulders would hit. I am supposed to be explaining n/m, rational numbers and number order. This would seem pretty simple. In terms of students, though, what you got is what you got and my favorite quote from yesterday was the following: “Miss, I don’t know multiplication. What is four times four?” She’s twelve, a nice girl and no more lost than a number of others. Most of them are lost.

The next day, I felt much calmer. I think my mission may be holding up the others until I retire. My other mission will be trying to teach students enough of the scripted material so they do not feel completely clobbered at the end of the year.

I will throw the most sensible boulders I can find.